Well, the last time that happened to me...I mean...hypothetically if it
were to happen to me, I would move through the following checklist:
10 Question Checklist to see if retrieving a lure is “worth it”
1) On a scale of 1-10, how much do I love that lure?
If <5, consider it a premature Christmas ornament
If >5, go on to question 2.
2) How much was the lure worth?
If<$2.00, call it a sacrifice to the fish gods, and move on
If>$2.00 but <$10.00 go on to question 3.
If>$10.00 start brushing up on your breast stroke
3) How many fish have you caught with that lure?
If 0, pretend like you meant to snag it, and sentence it to a rusty demise
If>0 but <100 go to question 4
If>100 tell the paramedics treating your hypothermia to keep track of the lure until you get out of the hospital
4) How much will your wife make fun of your naked body?
If <once a week then stop fishing, get on your knees, and thank God for sending you an extraordinary woman. Also, make an appointment to have her eyes checked.
If<once a day weigh your options carefully: your pride vs. a shiny lure...make sure you dry off completely.
If the thought of your naked body has her in fits of laughter already remind her that if it were her stuck in the tree it would be your naked body that saves her. Ask her what she means by, “Drowning’s not such a bad way to die.”
5) How good of a swimmer are the toddlers?
Shame on you. Move on to number 6.
6) Is there a camera anywhere?
If yes than just walk away. Guaranteed those pics would end up titled “Catch of the Day” at
www.nakedfishermen.com.
If no, then you can always maintain deniability. Surf’s up!
7) Did you just go check www.nakedfishermen.com?
If yes, then don’t admit it. To anyone. Ever.
If no, then I’m with you. Don’t know if there’s anything there, don’t want to know. I shudder to think what might be found in the “jigging” section.
8) On a scale of 1-10, how good of a swimmer are you?
If >5, I say hop in and go get your hardware
If <6 strip down the toddlers and get them ready to “come into the biiiig bath if daddy starts screaming.”
9. Shame on me.
Move to number 10.
10. If you still haven’t gone in the water, don’t. A real man doesn’t stop to ask questions, he just strips and swims! Get the lures, put up with the ridicule, say HI to the paramedics for me, and get those kids swimming lessons. See you at nakedfishermen.com!
lurechucker
@!ts"]s@!ts[/url] and giggles of it. But I never stip down. I just go for it. [
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